Sunday, July 11, 2021

Five weeks tomorrow and finally the pain has lessened a tiny bit

I have gone through a few days now with only a bit of tears instead of a flood every day. I almost feel like I am betraying her memory by not crying every day. Am I forgetting her?  My thoughts seem to go in many different directions. I wonder about how I got here, since it seemed like i would never feel peace or  the beginning of a mending heart again.

I still have my moments, but the pain is less severe. Its still there but not as intense. My heart feels like its beginning to heal. I kiss her urn good morning and good night and occasionally talk to her during the day as if she was here. I do feel sad and miss her terribly and wish this was all a bad dream. At those moments it feels like a knife pierces my heart. But amazingly I survive.

I am hopeful that someday I may love another furry baby again. For now I still grieve my baby with all my heart and of course the tears are flowing now that I am talking about it.

Today I will send love to her and remember and cherish her memory and our wonderful times together and hope the universe with its amazing synchronicity regarding matters of the heart will find the perfect timing for me to share my life again with a furry child.

Blessings to you all

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